sooner or later you see that side of the cannon

you look up from the jar you had your hand in

A sermon on the turning point in the book of Esther

I have a confession…

I know! I know! You can’t believe it. Why I see you sitting there, clutching your breast. I know what you’re thinking, too. You’re thinking, “How could that be, Pastor Ryan?!? You’re perfect! You’ve never done anything wrong!” I know…

What?!? Nothing?!? No one is surprised?!? 

Yesh. Well, at least some of you could be a little taken aback! No? Nothing? Oh well… 

Ok, I’ll quit stalling. Here’s my confession: there’s this part of me that’s constantly making these comparisons. 

For instance, when I read this stirring account of Esther taking up her mantle and risking her neck. A part of me hears all that and still thinks, “Easy for you, Esther. At least you were queen.”

*They say we’ve all fallen short of the glory of God. But that hasn’t stopped us from measuring the distance. And your dear pastor, I’m afraid to say, is a prime example of that. 

Now let me say, I’m not proud of this way of thinking. It’s utterly devoid of anything remotely resembling imagination or empathy. It tends to take me and my struggles far too seriously. And it drastically underestimates the very real trials and tribulations of others, too. Plus, it fails to even bother considering the warp and woof of someone else’s life. 

It’s really the lowest form of thinking. Reptile brain stuff. And the truth is, the quicker I quit thinking this way, the sooner life becomes enchanting.

Before we move on, though, and this is an aside, I also want to say that this way of thinking also turns on you real quick. Constantly comparing is not only inconsiderate of others. It’s also inconsiderate of yourself. 

Here’s a little exercise: Have you ever had some tough break, but then something inside you said, “at least it’s not as bad as fill-in-the-blank”? Yeah?

Ok. Well, guess what? I know this seems like a way put your suffering in context. But it actually only makes your suffering that much worse! Listen carefully; your grief doesn’t care one whit if there are worse travails out there! 

This line of thinking doesn’t add any comfort. On the contrary, it only adds accusations! This way of thinking will leave you not only suffering whatever bad breaks life throws your way. It’ll also leave you suffering the heartless recriminations you’re giving yourself for feeling the way you do! 

As if you made any choice at all to feel so lousy anyway.

It’d be funnier if it weren’t so unpleasant. Wouldn’t it? 

We’re not very compassionate. Are we? We’re not compassionate with others. AND we’re not very compassionate with ourselves, either.

…But today’s Scripture reveals another problem with this way of thinking. Because there’s more going on in Esther’s story than a queen deciding to act on her power. What our compulsively comparative way of thinking fails to consider is that Esther wasn’t always queen!

And I don’t mean she was a lady-in-waiting once upon a time, either. I mean, Esther became queen through some icky beauty contest the king held. And the king held this odious contest, by the way, because he deposed his previous bride. The king deposed on Queen Vashti after she failed to attend to his bid and call as he saw fit.

Turns out, queen isn’t as powerful a position as our unimaginative way of thinking presumes. 

That’s not all, though. Because it’s not just that Esther is queen because she caught a break. And it’s not just that this position Esther caught is a precarious one, either. It’s that Esther’s whole life has been precarious! 

First of all, the king Esther’s dealing with isn’t the king of Israel. No, he’s the king of Persia. In other words, Esther’s a foreigner. A foreigner living in a foreign land. A foreign land that isn’t all that hospitable to Esther and her people.

Moreover, Esther didn’t relocate to this foreign territory in search of a better life. No, her kin was forcibly deported there when Babylon sacked Jerusalem! Esther is living in Susa because she’s collateral damage of international intrigue. 

Plus, that Mordecai who cajoles Esther to act; he’s not some bossy older brother. No, Mordecai’s Esther’s cousin! Mordecai adopted Esther after her parents died. 

Esther’s born with two strikes against her! She’s an orphan, and she’s a foreigner, to boot. Plus, if you count how women were treated, well, that makes three strikes!

Esther’s not equivocating when Mordecai bids her to say something to the king. She’s just someone who already lost it all once and knows how easily it all goes belly up. But you’ll never entertain such a notion if you’re too busy trying to measure how Esther stacks up against your standards.

…You know what, though? Trying to determine how ethical Esther was or wasn’t isn’t just a fool’s errand. It’s also the best way to estrange yourself from all the guidance her story has to offer! 

Truthfully, Esther’s plight is ours. And our plight is Esther’s, too. But you’ll never learn that if all you want to know is if she meets your moral mark!

Esther, like the rest of us, is just trying to keep her head above water. Isn’t she? And I’m going to have to call your bluff if you’re going to try and tell me that’s not what ninety-nine percent of your decision-making consists of, too!

We’re all just trying to get by in this helter-skelter ol' world. Aren’t we? And it’s hard enough without adding a bunch of extra judgment to the mix. Isn’t it?

You’ll notice, though, that while Mordecai may be a little put off by Esther’s hemming and hawing, he doesn’t browbeat her. No, first of all, and surprisingly, too, Mordecai just appeals to Esther’s own self-interest. Mordecai tells Esther she should think twice if she believes that awful ethnic agenda will stop at the king’s gates. 

But then, more interestingly, Mordecai, seemingly as an afterthought, makes this wild conjecture! “Who knows,” Mordecai wonders aloud. “Who knows? Perhaps YOU have come to royal dignity for just such a time as this.”

“Perhaps YOU have come to royal dignity for just such a time as this.” It’s a guarded consideration. Isn’t it? And yet, it’s a consideration nonetheless. It’s a rumination that’s not closed off by fear or self-righteousness. 

And, wouldn’t you know it, this God-weighted speculation cracks Esther’s way of seeing things wide open! 

Inspired, Esther acts! And that’s where our reading stops. But it’s not where Esther’s story stops. No, Esther hatches a plan. 

And it works, too! They foil Haman’s evil scheme! And Esther and her fellow Jewish people aren’t just spared. No, they also enshrine a law ensuring their ongoing protection!

…With that, it’s easy to think it was all clear-cut. Isn’t it? But did you know that God is NEVER once mentioned in the book of Esther? Yes, there are some strange happenstances and uncanny coincidences. But God thyself is never explicitly spoken of!

God doesn’t show up at the end to say Mordecai was right all along. It’s all left as a hunch. And that’s true to real life. Isn’t it? 

In this pell-mell existence of ours, it’s hard to make heads from tails of anything. Much less the hand of God. As Joseph teaches us, faith only looks at life in hindsight. 

This is called theological humility. And it’s overdue. Isn’t it?

But here’s the deal. This humility doesn’t throw up its hands and cease to look for God. On the contrary, it does like Mordecai! It can’t stop imagining what recourse there may be since God’s hand is the one on the wheel of providence!

But that makes this the point where I must depart from the delightful subtly of Esther. Now is not the time for circumlocutions! NO, now is the time to speak explicitly of God! No, that’s not radical enough! Now is the time, as Luther taught Erasmus, to make assertions! Now is the time to speak on behalf of God!

So, here we go! At the incarnation, GOD was as subtle as a sledgehammer! Literally! By the incarnation, God DEMOLISHED that dividing line between God and you! Now, the really naive way to look at your life is one consigned to your own estimations!

…Here’s the deal, though; you CAN’T convince yourself of this. You, like Esther, must have faith put into you! Otherwise, you’ll never dare to assume so exalted an outlook! 

So listen up! The relief and deliverance Mordecai was dead sure of HAS definitively RISEN! And he came from an unlikely quarter, too. A manger! 

And then, he went ahead and spent the rest of his life in those liminal places, too! 

I know! I know. I shouldn’t have used such a technical term; “liminal.” Only a bored scholar would come up with a word like that. But all liminal means is “in-between." Like limbo.

Christ spent his life in those places betwixt and between so that when you would find yourself in such a spot, you would have no reason to doubt whatsoever that God had not only called you there but that God was also right there alongside you, too!

And if you’re not so sure about all that, well, allow me to up the ante! In your baptism, God promised no less to you! In your baptism, God took something as nebulous as death and used it as the means by which you were indelibly marked by Christ’s Holy Spirit! Christ’s Holy Spirit, which will never forsake you! No, not ever! No, no matter what! Come what may!

God has sanctified ALL your life! God is at work in every nook and cranny of it! There’s no corner of your life that Christ is ashamed or embarrassed to show up right in the middle of and get to work!

What’s more, CHRIST, by his predilection for those ambiguous places, has especially blessed those disorienting moments we all find ourselves in so often! 

The cross is your Christmas star that shines year-round! And it always points away from yourself and your schemes! And instead, it constantly points to Christ and his complete salvation for you!

Your fate was never in your hands to begin with! God spared YOU from that burden from the beginning of time! 

However, God has done more than just release YOU from that load. No, God has also put it all upon Christ’s shoulders! And by his “it is finished,” Christ fulfilled fate itself for you! 

In Christ, existence itself has been given back to you! Only now, it’s no longer a project to manage. Now your life is sanctified as nothing less than a great divine escapade! 

Now, YOU, like Mordecai, have no reason not to think God’s not up to something when you’re down to nothing! God is at work in the hustle and bustle of life! And God’s not winded by it, either! No, God’s even busier, FILLING it all with Christ’s Holy Spirit!

…And with that, we have arrived at the moment of all due subtly at long last. So allow me to do a little ruminating, if you will. Namely, I wonder WHAT this will mean for the rest of your life.

Perhaps it’ll mean a little more humility. And a lot MORE compassion, too! Compassion for yourself. And no less compassion for others. Who knows?

Perhaps it’ll light YOUR life with a bit of that sacred fire that lit the cosmos. Perhaps it’ll infuse your day-to-day with some imagination and adventure. Perhaps it’ll transform an obligation or two into nothing less than an instance burning with divine fortuity itself. Who knows? 

Perhaps it’ll even give you a glimpse of that holy firestorm that set the stars in their courses somewhere as nearby as the very person sitting right next to you! Or maybe even in those closest to you. You know, the ones we’re always tempted to take for granted. Or maybe even in someone you most disagree with. You know, the ones we always want to think are furthest from us. Who knows?

I know I wish you all that. And way more, too. But who knows? 

God, I suppose. GOD only knows. And I mean that, by the way. That’s no expression. God only knows. 

Then again, that’s kind of the thrill of it. Isn’t it?

Hark! A Thrilling Voice Is Sounding!; ELW 246